Dreams

One must never underestimate their power. Many ancient and tribal cultures have understood that the world of dreams provides a glimpse behind the veil of consciousness, a view of the world beyond what our impoverished senses convey. Unfortunately, we live in a time and place that values only what the senses convey, a society addicted to sensation but numb to truth. I have always had vivid dreams. Strangely enough, the scary ones have given me the greatest truth.

 

Nightmares haunted me frequently when I was young.

There was a creature pursuing me through a labyrinth. I couldn't see the creature, but I heard it making a noise that grew louder as it caught up with me. I ran furiously and managed to reach a point where the noise finally died away. Thinking myself safe, I opened a door and heard the blare of a thousand horns.

It was dark, and I was locked outside the house as I heard my parents talking within. I knocked on the door furiously, but they didn't hear me. Suddenly I heard a noise behind me, from across the street in the neighbor's yard. Turning, I peered into the darkness and saw something moving over there. I slowly walked toward it, and then it lurched at me with a growl.  

A strange man hunted me with a gun. I figured out that I was dreaming and forced myself awake, relieved to find myself in my bedroom. But suddenly his shadow sprang up on the wall.

A giant dinosaur interrogated me with words I couldn't understand, digging its talons into my ribs.

After my parents divorced, I awoke in my bedroom at my mom's house during the night and knew something was wrong. If I didn't leave that room, something terrible would come out of the darkness, likely the closet. I made my way across the house to my mother's room, relieved to find her sleeping there. Her back was turned to me. As I touched her shoulder to tell her I was scared, she whipped around with bright green eyes and grabbed me.

As I stood in a dark hallway, I saw the faint and misshapen silhouette of someone at the other end.  Squinting, I saw it was the Elephant Man. He rushed toward me.

Though not as frequent, nightmares still have paid me occasional visits into adulthood.

I was a police officer investigating a case of child abuse. My partners and I found a mother doing something to her daughter, though we weren't sure what, so I ordered that the daughter be taken into a separate room so I could figure things out. As I approached the mother, I heard a scream and saw the daughter run back into view, with an older woman's head on her body. I turned to look at the mother and saw a little girl's head on her shoulders, smiling and laughing while the daughter kept screaming.

I was a vampire, and a group of people dragged me outside to witness dawn. When dawn broke, I felt flames envelop me.

Sometimes I awaken in a "hypnagogic" state -- my mind is conscious, but my body is asleep and will not obey my commands to move. It feels as though I could be paralyzed indefinitely, and I strain to force myself out of bed but can't budge. While trapped one time, I felt something move at the foot of the bed and work its way onto my chest, pressing down on me. I struggled to make it stop; it did, but then I felt the covers being pulled off me, and a hand grabbed my leg. It was a waking dream, but it felt real.

As horrifying as these experiences were, I view them as a gift that instructed me early on about a simple truth: the placid waters of daily life are mere illusion, and all manner of creature lurks just beneath the surface. Most people choose to ignore the creatures; I can't.